One of the city’s attention-seeking girls on ‘Farmer Wants a Wife’ is kicked off the Monday night show after being caught lying, causing the violently sexy cattleman to wish he had just slept with the gaudy daughter of one of the local ladies from CWA.
A series of failed attempts to get attention end up hitting a girl who is out of her mind, and it all backfires. She ran away from the city. The villagers line up and cheer, waving their wool flat caps in the air.
These city girls are a handful. Without Uber and same-day delivery from The Iconic, they just don’t know how to survive.
JAMES WEIR SUMMARY:Read all reports here
The last time we saw Alicia, she was trying to manipulate Farmer Will into paying attention to her by threatening to leave the show. The trick backfired when – surprise! It made Will grit his teeth and roll his eyes.
Her desperation to be noticed only intensifies the next morning when Will chooses a girl named Jess for a solo date. With nothing to do, Alicia sits on Will’s back deck, seething. The only thing we take away from this is that despite Will’s tidy appearance, he doesn’t seem to care about cleaning his yard.
“I have to try to speak out, otherwise I will be forgotten,” says Alicia.
Girl, you have to fully speak. No, scream! Scream at Will for not putting you above other ladies. He will love it! Obstinacy is total excitement.
Alicia has nothing to lose and everything can be gained. And she’d better act now, because things move fast on Will’s date with Jess—faster than the ramshackle old boat they’re rowing around his parents’ dam.
The conversation turns to babies. Both want a family. But Jess wants to go the more traditional route and get engaged first.
“I want everyone to have the same last name on my Medicare card,” she says.
This is a good moment. A bunch of different names on a Medicare card is simply tasteless.
Later, back at the farm, Alicia decides to discreetly show her bad mood. While Will is hanging out with other girls, she boycotts and decides to fight for his attention by sulking in bed.
Now that Alicia is energized enough and resentment is coursing through her veins, the producers have Will surprise her with a really bad one-on-one date. We happily watch as her face lights up with the news that she’s getting solo time. And then we chuckle as her face turns scowling when she finds out that the date involves cleaning up the old, rusty tub that’s used as a feeder. Everything goes according to plan.
While scrubbing the stubborn brown stains on the porcelain tub, Alicia is actually telling Will that she’s backed off for the past two days because she wants more attention. She hopes that her sullenness will increase his affection for her. This is not true.
“I think there is still…potential?” his voice rises high as he describes the chances for their relationship to flourish: “… I’m not going to… rule it out?”
Hm. Not quite the words Alicia wanted to hear. The silence is broken by the sound of a hose filling a dirty trough.
This chat makes Alicia even more grumpy than before.
“I don’t know how that conversation went,” she tells the producer. “What the hell did he even say? You know? Because I don’t!
Oh, let us clarify: he said that he would continue to tolerate you, but his high voice indicated uncertainty about your erratic behavior. Hope this clears up!
Envy doesn’t just desecrate Farmer Will’s property. At Farmer Benjamin’s, a certain lady named Lindsey is devastated that one of the other girls has been chosen for a date in accordance with the rules of a show she volunteered to join.
“I was jealous,” she says, standing in a field watching Benjamin and another girl fly in a helicopter. “I’ve never been in a helicopter – it’s just wow.”
Relax Linds. We will create a GoFundMe page and raise money to buy you a Red Balloon voucher.
Back at Farmer Will’s establishment, Alicia redoubles her strategy to completely disregard everyone in an attempt to get attention.
“I don’t want to go,” she mutters at the mention of farm work. “I don’t feel it anymore. I just feel like when I talk, he can’t hear me.”
She then deals with her feelings like an adult by locking herself in the guest bedroom.
Will breaks in. – Are you ready to go?
Alicia falls into the single bed. “I don’t know. I don’t know if I want to go.” She rubs her eyes. “(I’m) just a little tired.”
He doesn’t give up.
“Okay, I’ll go,” he snorts, getting out of bed. “Enjoy the peace and quiet. Okay, take care of yourself. We’ll be back soon.
By now, Will is fed up.
“Yesterday I got to chat with Alicia and I feel like the air has cleared up a bit,” he tells us outside of their date while we were cleaning the tub. “But in my opinion, I don’t really understand what can change so quickly.” He winces and rolls his eyes at the camera. “Uh-huh, I don’t know. This is me honestly. Like, should I be honest, or what?
He was tired of tricks and childish attempts to attract attention. The more Alicia tries to pull him in, the more she pushes him away. Wow. Deep.
Once again, Alicia’s strategy doesn’t go according to plan. Hm! How dare Will prioritize his livelihood by taking care of his farm instead of paying attention to it!
She looks at the peeling paint on the corrugated wall of the centuries-old farmhouse and is angry that her plan has backfired again. In her mind, she imagines all the annoying ways other girls will use farm work to flirt with Will. And then she jumps to her feet, runs into the kitchen and snatches a random pair of car keys from a bowl of fruit on the kitchen island.
Moments later, she is speeding down a dirt road in a white Toyota Land Cruiser. He stops when she spots Will with other girls. Excitement creates a cloud of dust – a symbolic message to other ladies: eat my dirt.
The driver’s door swings open and Alicia jumps out of the car.
“What are we doing?!” she jumps up and down, trying to appear frivolous.
What are you all doing? Head to the sheep yard, baby doll, that’s what you do.
As soon as they are there, Alicia immediately proves that she is not simple and carefree.
The sun is starting to set and all the girls are washing up in anticipation of a drinking party that will end with someone coming home to town. Unsurprisingly, Alicia’s emotional roller coaster is back on track. We see her pouting at other ladies while putting on her makeup. She tells them again that she just wants to leave.
“I would rather just get it over with,” she says.
“I am not the kind of person who will cling to something half-hearted. I don’t want to be half loved or half loved. I don’t agree half way.”
Reminder: It’s been less than a week.
At dinner, Will can’t even finish his steak before being forced to take a moping Alicia out to the backyard for a chat.
“I think you are amazing,” she begins. “…And you are exactly the person I want to be with…”
After all her whining, we think she’s finally going to walk away in a blaze of glory and dump him before he can dump her. But then he interrupts and starts chatting about how much he values honesty and trust and that he hopes they can be truthful with each other. He promises to tell her if there ever comes a time when she really doesn’t have a chance at his heart and asks about it. she is promise to tell him when she doesn’t want to be on the farm anymore.
Well we know she doesn’t want to be on the farm. She won’t shut up about it. He gave her a great opportunity to get away from the competition. Apparently this means she’s going home tonight…
“No one’s going home tonight!” Will announces to the table as they return inside.
Two blondes are fed up. They worked tirelessly to impress Will and spent hours listening to Alicia moan about how hard it is to live without Deliveroo. So, one of the blondes becomes a fraud.
“OK. I’ll be honest,” she says, turning to Alicia. “Obviously we had a conversation today and you seemed to be very confident in your decision that you wanted to go home.”
The revelation makes Will’s eyebrows rise to the ornate tin ceiling.
“Therefore, I did not expect such an outcome,” the blonde continues.
“Okay, I’m a little lost now,” Will scrunches up his face.
Alicia knows she’s been arrested. She starts to climb. “Yes, in general, today I chatted with the girls. … And I told them that I wanted to go home.”
Will bangs his head on the table and curses himself again for not just sleeping with the tasteless daughter of one of the local CWA ladies.
Outside, on Will’s dirty deck, Alicia backs off.
“I want you to know that everything I said was not dishonest,” she blurts out. “I said that I want to be here 100 percent. I just overlooked the fact that in the last few days I felt like I absolutely didn’t want to be here.”
Will sighs. He then kicks one of his worn RM Williams boots in the mud and chuckles. Glancing at the woman who continues to flutter with his heart, he shoots her with a knowing look.
“It’s all right,” he smiles. “And you know what? I’ll just get rid of those other girls—right now. Tonight. They can go home. I just want you.”
Crazy. He spews.
“I am here for my future, I am here for the long haul, I am here for the rest of my life. And I can’t see it with you,” he snaps.
He puts his hands on his hips and looks at Alicia through the darkness. – Well see you.
Then he slowly steps back and leans against the corrugated iron canopy.
“Fuck me dead,” he sighs.
It’s almost like a missed opportunity that the producers didn’t record the scene with a really sad slide guitar instrumental.