The funniest quotes from the “Twilight” movies

Hold on tight, spider monkeys.

V dust movies – also known as five films adapted from Stephenie Meyer’s famous vampire series – not really meant be funny.

They are actually excited, dramatic, and overly excited! (Especially if you look at them 10+ years later.)

So many hockey dialogues! So, in honor of the good dustrelated laughter, let’s list a few quotes, shall we?


You better hold on tight, spider monkey.

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So Edward – a vampire – can jump very high and very far. You would think that after more than 100 years of life, he would find a more eloquent / suave way to reveal this information.


“You are like my personal brand of heroin.”

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We’ll get it. Bella smells good to Edward. Edward wants to eat (or maybe snort?) Bella. However, this phrase is so commonplace.


“This is the skin of the killer, Bella.”

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The look on his face really underscores the ridiculousness.


“You named my daughter after the Loch Ness Monster ?!”

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For context, Jacob / Werewolf (Taylor Lautner) captures Bella’s little daughter Renesmee in Breaking Dawn Part 2, he calls her Nessie for short.


“Bella! Where the hell have you been, Loka? “

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This New moon the greeting lives without rent in my head in the most horrible way.


“I guess the wolf fell out of the bag.”


“Stop trying to undress. It may be too late for my soul, but I will protect yours. “

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How dare your old girlfriend try to sleep with you! Horror! Laughing out loud.


“Shouldn’t people from Arizona be like this, really tanned?”


“Doesn’t he have a shirt?”

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No, probably because Jacob’s clothes rip every time he transforms into a werewolf.


“And so the lion fell in love with the lamb …” / Summit Entertainment

Edward. Again: you have been living for over a century. I know you have a better analogy.


“Say it out loud. SAY IT”.

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I wouldn’t be scared either, TBH.


[Bella, about Edward] “I was absolutely sure about three things. First, Edward was a vampire. Second, there was a part of him – and I didn’t know how dominant that part could be – that was out for my blood. And thirdly, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him. “


“Every second that I am with you is restraint … and you are too fragile.”


“I’m just for you, Bella. It would be as easy with me as breathing. “


“You know, Jacob, if we weren’t natural enemies and you weren’t trying to steal the reason for my existence, I would really like you.”


“You hurt my ego, Bella. I just proposed to you and you think this is a joke. “


[Jasper, voting to change Bella into a vampire]: “I vote for. It would be nice not to want to kill you all the time. “


“You can’t trust vampires … Trust me.”


[Bella, after turning into a vampire]: “I understand what everyone is talking about. Jake, you really stink. “


[Edward, to a newly turned Bella]: “We have the same temperature now.”


Alice: ” fetus this is bad for Bella! “

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Okay, I understand that the Cullen family is debating whether Bella should stay pregnant with a half-vampire baby, but … out of context, this “fetus” line is pretty funny.


“So this party. Will there be strippers? “

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Edward: “Just a few mountain lions, a couple of grizzly bears.”


Charlie Swan: “Edward will be a good husband. I know this because I am a police officer. I know a thing or two. For example, how to hunt someone to the ends of the earth. And I know how to use a weapon. “


Jessica: “So you think Bella will show?” Angela: “Jess, she’s not pregnant!” Jessica: “Good… Who else gets married at 18 ?? “


“Bella, I hope you’ve got enough sleep over the past 18 years. Because for some time you won’t sleep anymore! “

Have we forgotten anything? What are your favorite funny quotes from dust cinema?

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