“Was I a jerk for not going to my sister’s wedding because of ridiculous ‘requirements’?”

Weddings are celebrations of love, life and laughter. Hosting them can also be incredibly expensive, so it’s only natural that some happy couples want everything to be perfect. If you’re spending tens (and possibly even hundreds) of thousands of dollars on something, you want that appropriate An event that will leave a lasting impression. But the material things—though important—pale in comparison to the soft things that really matter: family, friends, and delicious cake.

However, not everyone is able to accept the idea that something may go wrong during their marriage. They need everything, absolutely everything, to be perfect. So much so that they go off the rails a bit. For example, one man told the AITA community how he Decided not to participate. Her sister’s wedding precisely because of how ridiculous her ‘requirements’ for guests were.

Check out Redditor’s story below, Panda. Let us know what you think about the whole family/marriage/materialism drama. Oh, and we’d love to hear about your recent wedding experiences, too. Have you been to any love events this year? What did you love and hate most about them? Leave in the comments section and let us give you a slice of cake and a glass of whatever you enjoy the most.

Anna and SarahOn team leaders The Wedding SocietyShare your thoughts on the dynamic between couples and their guests. KristenBellTattoos.com. Scroll down to read what they had to say.

Some brides want to control every little thing and even micromanage their guests.

Image credit: Judah Art (not original picture)

One man shared how he reacted when he realized his sister, the bride-to-be, made a huge list of requirements for everyone attending.

Image credit: Mikhail Nilov (not original picture)

Can we just take a moment to acknowledge that the OP’s throwaway account username, u/MoneyMoneyMoney300, is considering how superficial and content-focused her sister is. Is? OK, good.

Although the story is a few years old, the debate itself is timeless. The post highlights some of the most important issues related to marriage. How can we not expect to be able to control everything that happens during a celebration (even though we want to and, heck, we can even try!) How can we not see the forest for the trees because of the minor details? It bothers us a lot. And how we sometimes ask too much of people without realizing it because we care too much about what we want and how we look.

Relaxing a bit, learning to go with the flow, showing resilience, and finding unexpected fun and even happiness are all things that make life special. Trying to control every aspect of marriage is like trying to control nature and its forces. You cannot dictate how others will react or feel during the ceremony and reception. You can’t ban people from taking photos of your special day. And you certainly can’t demand that all boys shave their beards and that women can’t have shoulder-length hair (unless they wear it in a ponytail). This is the kind of soulless micromanagement you’d expect in a semi-dystopian corporation, not an event celebrating the union of two souls.

Don’t get us wrong, some structure is fine. Heck, you can even have a dress code and ask guests to wear a certain range of colors or materials. But you can’t expect everyone to follow these rules (there must be at least one stray in every marriage) or that everyone is willing to invest the time, energy, and money you expect.

Anna and Sarah, s The Wedding Society, were kind enough to answer our questions about what couples can do to make sure they’re not asking too much of their guests, as well as how they can focus less on the superficial details of the wedding. And ‘how much money’ guests should bring. happy couple

“Couples can ask trusted close friends and family if they are reasonable with their request. Be prepared to get honest feedback and adjust your expectations so that you are guided by what you listen to. go,” Anna, from The Wedding Societyexplained to us.

“It’s hard not to get caught up in the details of the day, but it’s important to remember that while it’s all happening, it won’t really matter much to you. After it’s all over, you’ll remember the feeling of the day. Not the minute details,” he shared.

According to Anna and Sarah, there is “no real formula” for the exact amount that guests should gift to the wedding couple.

“The best etiquette is to try and cover your event expenses, plus a little extra if your budget allows,” say wedding industry experts.

“At the end of the day, gifts should be meaningful and authentic rather than meeting the couple’s expectations. It really can’t be your fault if the couple is disappointed.

A study conducted by The Knot It has been found that The average cost of attending a wedding as a guest in 2021 was $460. That’s about $30 more than in 2019. Local weddings cost less ($270) because guests save on transportation and lodging. However, going to out-of-town events costs an average of $660.

If you had to fly, you’d spend an average of $1,270. Wedding favors cost around $160 and are all part of that number. So with prices like these, adding more and more demands to the guests makes them feel that attending the wedding is not worth it at all. And there are things. It will only get more expensive in 2022. As inflation increases.

AITA crowd mostly thought OP did nothing wrong except marrying his sister. After all, it was clear that a woman values ​​money more than the company of her family and friends. Who knows though, in three years of marriage, the sister has become a completely different person and has learned what to prioritize. We like to be optimistic.

Here’s how some people who read the story reacted to the wedding drama.

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